it's not only a bra

I'm going to do this. I most likely fall into Rank 1, by the way, which means knee or even wall push-ups are my starting point. It'll come in handy as something to do during the Engaged Encounter, a reprieve-less weekend of pre-marriage counseling required by the Catholic Diocese of Honolulu. They won't let us go home to walk our dog, much less go for a leisurely run around Kaneohe.

K, I'm going to go do the initial test and will report back with my results.

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And the results are in: I am a Rank 1 Cream Puff. I can do exactly four good-form knee pushups before my arms scream at me to stop the insanity.

Remember the Presidential Fitness Test in elementary school? For me, the most humiliating part of that entire ordeal every year was the flexed-arm hang. Because it had to be performed with an overhand grip, I always failed. Five seconds was considered passing, so anyone who couldn't actually stay chinned for five seconds was required to hang like a monkey for their five seconds. That was me, the PE monkey. Eventually I discovered that I could do the flexed-arm hang, or even work a couple of pull-ups - if I used an underhand grip instead. I used the laundry line poles on the weekends to practice so that eventually I could bust out my new moves on the playground (the monkey bars, natch.)

I guess knee pushups are like underhand-grip flexed-arm hangs. Baby steps, as with anything. But they sure do look stupid.