i am in hiding
I was reminded by Mama's hilarious tooth fairy post (and I must agree, girl fairies rock so much harder than the boy ones) about this hideous mistake I made yesterday.
We were talking about our Life Graphs when the subject of Santa Claus came up. I have been working with kids for about 10 years now - ages ranging from pre-K (3s and 4s) to high school juniors - and I'm pretty confident about my abilities, whether it's assessing a situation for danger (epic temper tantrum to campus lockdown and everything in between), or teaching my own weakest subject (math), or knowing when a kid can laugh something off or is going to blow his top. I can clean up blood and vomit, invoke excitement over an Eratosthenes' sieve, and perform the many kinds of sleight-of-hand needed to keep a schoolday running smoothly.
But I cannot, apparently, correctly gauge whether I have a class of Believers or Cynics.
I mentioned Buddha, right? He's not called Buddha because he's a peace-loving philosopher. He's called Buddha because he's huge. I meant Buddha in the lobby-at-the-Cal sense, not the Keanu Reeves sense. Frankly, he's a bully. Funny and smart, but a bully. I've also got kids in here who just tested at 9th and 11th grade reading levels, kids with siblings from every circumstance you could imagine (and some you probably couldn't), and a kid who is called by her previous teachers as, simply, "The Manipulator."
Well. I thought I had a class of Cynics, and can you blame me?
I love my Cynics, by the way. Even Buddha. Even The Manipulator. I think they are awesome. But there was no question in my mind - they were Cynics.
So I started talking about Santa Claus and how before, when they were little, some of them believed that Santa Claus brought their presents and how now that they are older they can help their parents preserve the myth for their little brothers and sisters, help wrap presents and tell the kids stories, yada yada yada, what a great honor and tradition, isn't that fun, and oh my God why are they staring at me like that? What are they whispering about? Why can't they close their mouths? Sh*t! Mayday! MAYDAY!
They're TEN! They're ELEVEN! What the - ?!
I am in so much trouble.
Just my luck - Open House is tomorrow night. Can't wait to hear it.
4 comments:
That's scary. 10 and 11 year olds still believing in Santa. I know I may not be the best judge since I never believed, but still, I think the sparkle dies at about age 7 or 8, or at least, it should.
remind me to never tell you to break bad news to people. you're evil. not austin powers' villian evil but gotham city villian evil.
*draws in breath*
Ooooooooohhhhhh-Oooooooooohhhhhhh-Ooooooohhhhhhh
Ahana Kokolele peanut buttah jelleh I going tell on you, you going get in trouble!!!
Hahaha... j/k.
It's okay that you killed their Christmas hero, they were bound to find out one day.
Hehe, hope that makes you feel better.
Seriously though, everyone makes mistakes and that's the age that most kids stop believing anyway- I was about 8 or 9 when I figured it out, so it's not THAT bad. Just breathe. You'll do fine.
I'm trying to figure out if I ever believed. I must have. I know I believed in the tooth fairy, but that was killed early on because as a child, I was a light sleeper. The Easter bunny, forget it. I saw his head come off at the mall. But Santa? I'm really not sure.
Anyway, I am a big doof. But here's hoping Mama is right and that I simply did their parents a favor by breaking it to their kids so they wouldn't have to.
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