please?

Dear Sadistic Kung Pao Chicken-Making Neighbor,

If this 11 a.m. cooking endeavor is an attempt to get back at me for the aroma of lasagna emanating from my apartment at 9 this morning, I must confess that as good as it smelled, it was just Lean Cuisine. In appearance and taste, it resembled crap. Here, I'll show you:

See? It doesn't even remotely resemble what it is supposed to look like according to its packaging. So, be a good neighbor and take pity. Invite me in, and feed me. I promise to keep my cat off your lanai and my bazouki music out of your ears.

Love,

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